Dream of IT

26.04.2007

Everything it’s so still, so quiet... A thick darkness has fallen over the crowded city, over this big room. In the middle of the room, a white bed with long flowing red drapes and a girl lying on it, fallen into a deep sleep. It seams as if nothing could disturb this calm night and her peaceful sleep, as if no creature of the darkness will haunt her dreams.The traditional English table clock suddenly stops ticking…it’s 3 A.M.. She slowly opens her eyes. There’s nothing and no one in the dark room but her…a deep sigh comes out of her lung, she seems sad, as if she hoped someone was there.A pale of wind pushes the window and moves the soft curtain, the room gets colder. The girl gets out of bed, wanting to close it but she suddenly stops two steps away…something it’s still moving under the curtain and the fear makes her freeze in that spot. A strange hand pulls the white curtain away and something appears…a strange shape, similar to a human body and yet…she knows that’s no human. That is the creature that haunts her every night, that’s her demon, a strange looking being that she can’t runaway from. Every night, the same hour, the same creature, the same dream…she can’t move, the creature comes closer and tries to touch her but never succeeds, always fading away in the dark.That tall creature looks frightening and yet…it’s eyes seem so soft, so gentle. That’s why the girl is never able to run away, the reason she always freezes in the same place. Every time the being appears, she seems scared but by the time it fades away, the fear disappears…and she opens her eyes, finding herself awake from that deep sleep, far from the dream creature and from any memory of it. Cause every time she opens her eyes, she completely forgets about it…She has this dream for so long ago, since she was a little girl and since then she tried a few times to keep the image of the being in her mind for more than one night, so that she could remember it after waking up, but she has never succeed. It always disappeared a little to soon for the image to take shape in her mind.An other night, the same hour, the same big city, the same room, the same bed, the same Fay. Lying on her white bed, her dark long hair is hiding her milky shoulders, her big black eyes stare at the ceiling mirror, waiting for her demon to appear. It seems that her efforts are starting to pay of. Bit by bit, she made it…she can now remember small pieces of the dream. At least now she knows that the being it’s not evil, and no longer fears it, even if it does not look appealing.Iron appears. This is how she calls the creature, cause it looks al gray and shiny like metal, like steel, though she does not know if that’s real steel for she has never been able to touch it. That’s a big contrast between the way it’s skin looks and the way the creature’s eye stare at her…between the coldness of that gray and the warmth of those blue sad eyes. And those big white feather wings it has…make him look somehow gentle, as if he is some kind of iron angel. Now, it’s appearance calm her, make her feel peaceful, as if IT is able to take any pain away, to chase all her bad thoughts and worries. It’s eyes look as if it’s trying to tell her something, it’s big strong arms trying to reach for her, to touch her soft skin, her silky hair…She fells that sad look and knows there’s something she should read in those eyes, there’s something she should hear…But there’s only deep silence, heavy darkness…no word, no sound, no movement. There is something she did not try before, maybe because she was afraid, maybe because she did not remember the dream…or maybe just because she thought it would be better to wait. But now…she really wants to do it, she feels the need to do it, the curiosity, the desire…Now…her hand is reaching for that being, in an attempt to touch it’s skin, to find out what is made of, to know if it’s real or just…an untouchable dream. Slowly, no sudden move, carefully…her fingers move close to it’s face. Should she touch it? Will it let her? The creature’s eyes close as if it’s actually encouraging her to do what she’s about to…so she closes her eyes too…and does it.Her soft, warm hand gently touches the smooth surface of it’s face. She expected to feel something cold but…it is warm and soft…and yet it shines, and it’s all grey. Touching that face she realizes that…it feels nothing similar to the way it looks…Even if it looks like a horrifying creature, like a monster, it feels human. All shapes are similar to what she has seen in every person…Cheeks, nose, lips, eyes…all human shapes…as if her miraculous demon disappeared and a man took it’s place. Now…this humanly shapes frighten her…so she quickly opens her eyes to find in front of her…nothing. It’s gone…her demon, her monster…her dream disappeared. Looking around she sees the same empty room as every night. But she remembers all…every color and shade the demon had, every shape her fingers felt, every sound she herd in the night …it’s all there, stored in a safe place inside her mind. Again she sighs finding herself lonelier than before, knowing that her dream disappeared for good, that her iron angel is forever gone. She has to go back in the real world and find that perfect man who haunted her empty nights…